The S’s of Sleep—12 Tips for Sleeping well
BY AMBER BATEMAN
6/15/2024
[For the audio recording of this blog post, download here.]
The white ceiling looked the same at 3 am as it had at 10 pm, and midnight, and 1:30. I lied there staring at it, hot tears streaming down my cheeks. I had been suffering from insomnia for a few months and to say I was discouraged was an understatement. I didn’t know what to do. My friends had offered their suggestions, some I tried, some I was too scared to, but nothing seemed to work. I often asked God why I had to go through this, if there was any purpose behind the torture of sleeplessness.
There are many reasons people struggle from poor sleep, and I won’t pretend to provide a cure all for everyone. But I think that one of the reasons I was allowed to experience insomnia was to be able to empathize with other people. It stinks. The insomnia I mean, not the empathy. You may have a long history with it, or maybe you just recently started waking up more in the night. Wherever you find yourself, I trust that these tips, what I’m calling the S’s of Sleep, can be helpful to you. Again, everyone’s reasons for sleep difficulty are varied, but these are some healthy sleep principles that are worth practicing no matter the cause. So let’s get into it.
Tips for Sleeping Well
REDUCE
1) Screens: do not look at any screens for 1 hour before you want to fall asleep. Read physical books instead. Research has shown that the blue light of screens confuses our brains to think it is still day and reduces the production of natural melatonin in the body. If you are serious about wanting to get better sleep, giving yourself an electronics curfew is an absolute must. Do not look at your phone, TV, computer, kindle, etc. at least 1 hour before you intend to go to sleep. If 1 hour without your phone seems way too out of reach, start with 30 minutes and work back from there.
2) Stimulation: avoid starting new activities or projects that stimulate a lot of thought or creativity at least 1 hour before you want to fall asleep. For example, writing a blog post is not something I should do in the late evening. Even though it’s enjoyable and exciting, it is too stimulating. My brain starts thinking of ideas, creative juices start flowing, and it is hard for me to shut them down again quickly. This is also why the electronics curfew is so important and why the dark modes and blue light filters are not enough for many people. Even if you reduce the blue light, you are still filling your brain with a lot of mental activity that makes it hard to shut down even when you put down the device. In an over stimulated, stressed out modern world, you have to take ownership for caring for your own brain. No one else will. [I should also note that substances such as caffeine and sugar, as well as rigorous physical exercise, can confuse the body into thinking it’s time to amp up rather than calm down, thus making sleep more difficult.]
3) Stress: managing stress well throughout the day is going to make it easier to manage stress at night. You may be thinking, “Uh obviously. But how do I do that, Amber?” I’m glad you asked, and stress management is a topic for another post, but for now just accept that you are not likely to cheat your body. If you haven’t prioritized caring for yourself throughout the day, it’s not going to be easy to start at night. As I said, more on this topic in the future…
Now let’s get to the DO’s section.
DO
4) Set up an ideal sleeping space. Take time to make the physical space you sleep in relaxing and comfortable. This does not necessarily require that you spend a lot of money redecorating your bedroom. It may mean investing in a good mattress and pillow, or it may mean decluttering and putting all the used cups, stacks of bills, and dog toys out of the room. It almost certainly will include cleaning the space if it’s dirty. Try using soft lighted lamps so you can begin dimming lights as you move closer to bedtime. You may also consider darkening the room with blackout curtains and setting the thermostat cooler (some sleep experts suggest between 65 and 68 degrees Fahrenheit is ideal).
5) Sounds: This is kind of a continuation of #4, but it starts with S so I made it its own tip. I would remove TV noise or music playing when you are ready to sleep. You could try a white noise machine (but not too loud) or put in earplugs to muffle noises that might wake you. Personally, I have found earplugs useful in reducing anxiety as well, further assisting in falling asleep.
6) Same routine. Develop at least a general bedtime routine, and a more specific one if that is comforting to you. Example: 8:30 pm—watch a 50 minute show/play a game/relaxing hobby, etc. 9:30 pm—take a shower and skin care routine. 10:00 pm—read physical book. 10:30 pm—lights out.
7) Stretch your body. Exercise or just move your body for at least 30 minutes during the day, but more if possible. There is quite strong evidence that physical activity during the day promotes good sleep at night. As previously mentioned, try to avoid rigorous physical exercise late in the evening, but you could try some gentle stretches or yoga poises if your body feels tense before bed.
8) Sun: Try to get at least 1 hour of sun exposure during the morning and early afternoon. This helps promote good circadian rhythm, as well as a good vitamin d boost.
9) Set an alarm if you need to wake up at a certain time, but do not look at a clock during the night. Remember back to my intro in this quite long blog post? I often looked at the clock in my insomnia days and it only made things exponentially worse. Absolutely no good comes from seeing how late it is. In my experience, this is a recipe for an anxiety attack. If you wake up and it’s still dark, and you can’t fall back asleep, try the last three sleep tips below, but don’t look to see what time it is.
10) Surrender: Practice deep breathing and mindfulness exercises, pressing into uncomfortable moments rather than trying to fight them. See a list of relaxation techniques here. And remember don’t look at your phone in the middle of the night to do these exercises. Just practice what you remember.
11) Still: Remember that resting your body is beneficial even if you can’t fall asleep in that moment. My mom used to tell me this when I was young and couldn’t fall asleep. She would say, “Okay, well just rest your body anyway.” This became a psychological trick for me that I would use to ease anxious thoughts about not being able to fall asleep. It may work for you too.
12) Seize the opportunity to practice silence and solitude with God or practice gratitude as you wait to fall asleep. This last one is also really personal to me. I have experienced special moments with God in the stillness of night. You can too. And thinking about all the things you are grateful for is really effective in reducing anxiety. Lastly, you may want to memorize some Scripture verses or prayers to recite as you lay awake at night. Here are a few of my favorites in case you are interested.
“In peace, I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.” — Psalm 4:8.
“Blessed are you Lord our God, King of the Universe, who brings sleep to my eyes and slumber to my eyelids. May it be your will, my God, and God of my ancestors, that I lie down in peace and that I arise in peace.” — Jewish prayer
I know this is a lot of information! But I believe that if you try these tips, you will see some improvement in your sleep. I mean and if not, you lost close to nothing. These are habits I stand behind for good mental health with almost no harmful side effects. I really hope you find something that works for you. Hang in there. I’m rooting for you.
Resources
https://www.sleepfoundation.org/how-sleep-works/how-electronics-affect-sleep
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8848117/
https://www.sleepfoundation.org/bedroom-environment/best-temperature-for-sleep
https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/features/morning-light-better-sleep